Skip to main content

Repeating Mistakes/ To fibit not to fitbit

LOL once I start blogging I can't stop.


So I'm in the exercise groove...I've been here before..the weight is coming off.  I'm eating right, feeling good..and then...I do too much, get frustrated and binge and then quit...sigh


So I started posting on 3 fat chicks again.  I felt like I need an outlet for things I was feeling without judgement and I like reading about other people struggles so I don't feel alone.  I am avoiding any challenges and any group posts.  The posts where everyone already knows everyone so you post but no one responds because they don't really know you...blah...


The reality is I don't do well on challenges and it stops becoming about weight loss and feeling good and more about "winning" nothing..because there is no actual prize.  If I win yeah..but often I "lose" and feel bad and then begins a downward spiral into feeling like a failure.  Weirdly this is also the reason I never got into counting carbs or calories.  It became this weird competition and if I went over...I was sad is my pants...


So that brings me to getting a fitbit. Right now the only thing I track is my weight on the scale.  As time goes by I'm not so much worried about the number. I mean obviously I want the number to go down, but the scale is my checkin to say ok are you eating right...I know I have a weigh in do I really want that second mojito?  


The fitbit feel like dietbet on my wrist.  (dietbet was another thing I failed at multiple times) ...I kinda of want it as another measure to see how I'm doing, but I can just imaging the guilt or failure if I don't measure up....blah so I guess that's a no to a fitbit. 


I feel like a solid workable long term plan for weight loss.  I don't want to rock the boat.  My first mini goal is 330-325.  That's the weight were clothes are too big, I can wear heels, and walking and stairs is pretty easy. 


Unrelated 4 lbs until I hit my first 20lb mark..but I'm ok as long as I'm the same or lower...I would love to lose it, but no more pressure myself to lose whatever to hit a number so I can "win"
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Can't stop Won't stop

So I'm about 2 lbs away from my monthly goal.  I haven't worked out in about a week, but I have been on plan for 3 days after the visit to my parents. I've realized the most important part of losing weight is staying focused.  If you fall off the wagon get up. If you are tilted to the side, get straight, but keep going.  The worse thing you can do is stop trying.  Over all I only lost 2 lbs, but I recovered from the bad weekend and my period came so all the days I stayed on plan meant I didn't have this huge gain. Stupidly proud of myself. Something else weird happened this week. I usually drink ice coffee, but its pricey, so I bought starbucks pre-made ice coffee.  I ended up having this weird sugar headache.  I ate food, thinking I wasn't eating enough.  After 2 hours I had a pack of oreos and it went away after about 40 min. The next day I had no coffee and no issues.  It makes me think there is something with the starbucks coffee...
Post a Comment
Read more

Wacky Scale, My Krptonite

Well I haven't posted in a while. Seems like I learn something new everyday. I went to my parents this weekend and just ate. I don't think I overate as much as I normally would have, but I ate more than I should have. I also had a few days where I went over my 2000 calories, but since I need 3000 to maintain my current weight I am still pretty ok. I kinda fell of the excercise wagon. I am trying to build up to Mon-Fri and weekendos off but just can't seem to get motivated to workout as soon as I get home. I have a part time job at night starting thursdays so we'll see what happens. I am guessing I am going to have to adjust to nights. So I weigh myself twice a month I know I have lost inches because the black jean that were once super tight even after I wore them a few times are now pretty lose. So thats night. But here is more proof the scale is wacky. Weighed myself last night 345. I didn't gain or lose. Weighed myself this morning after first bathroom t...
Post a Comment
Read more

Darn you to Heck Indian Food.

So yesterday I had lunch with my best friend.  She's smaller than me, but still heavy.  We went out to an Indian Buffet and I should have just ordered something from the menu, but I didn't want to spend to much since we were splitting the bill and had the buffet BAD MOVE.  It was all creamy sauce stuff which really begs to be poured over rice.  I was trying to pour it over the cauliflower dish, but that had potatoes in it.  I ended up just saying eff it and eating the cauliflower with a little potatoe.  Then my flawles logic *heavy sarcasm* said well if I'mma cheat go ahead and have the rice too.  I then had like 4 glasses of water.  I don't feel like I ate alot, the problem is I ate because of self peer pressure. I think of course wanted to punish myself and was going to make myself to a really hard workout today, but thought.  Ok I don't really want to do it...and I don't want to NOT workout because I don't want to do the work out.  ...
Post a Comment
Read more